The Junkie Inside

Like a junkie on a fix my eyes glazed as I caught sight of her.
The purpose of life, to love and to honor,
seems only right that I stay out of sight,
so as to make sure she isn't bothered.

What of my happiness, another might say.
I confess there isn't a moment I wouldn't want it another way.
However it goes this way and now here's where the words trip,
we all know it won't do that.

So as long as I am but a pain in my shroud I remain,
hiding my gaze behind my shades,
dreaming of an opportune moment to cheat at this game.
How it kills me to stay so still, kills me to hold my tongue, not to tell her how I feel.
She gets up to walk away, making sure not to look at me.
Stepping swiftly past a group of girls, passing the first set of doors.
She knew I was here the entire time, and knowing this I almost cry.
It hurts more than you'll ever know, to just sit and watch her go.

Some people pass at me a glancing craze,
while thoughts pace and argue for what seems like days.
I'd like to think I did the wrong thing,
but somehow I can't lie to myself, not that way.

Now these words I place at rest, as they quietly escape my head.
Sending them off each with a light, wishing they'll find her tonight.
Carefully putting my mind at ease, temporarily curing my disease.
Like a junkie my eyes glaze, as in my mind a vision of her image my eyes see.